I'm not proud of myself

 I think that's important for me to remember. This shits not easy and I'm not proud of myself. I blame my exes friends too much. 

Be sure to remember your own part Butterfly. You're not a saint dawg. 

You're lucky to be alive. Its ok to rant here. This is your safe space. Your dead ass blog won't tell you that you're crazy, but just try and be as honest as possible. 

You have an ankle bracelet because of emailing someone who doesn't want anything to do with you. You have an ankle bracelet because you have a history of running from police and fleeing probation.  

This is your safe space man. You can't get in trouble for speaking truth here. 

I fucked up my whole life with drugs and alcohol, but if you sit and think and stop fighting you have a TON of experiences to gain wisdom from. 

God (Something) is watching out for you dude. 

It'll all be ok if you just follow a few rules, be patient, and forgive yourself for the choices you've made. 

You'll be ok Joe. 

I'm not really scared to die, but I'm SO SO SO grateful I didn't get maimed or paralyzed in the crash. 

Thank you God for that. 

Remember the dream you had when you crashed? Why are you giving up? 

I think I was just scared. But I don't have to be anymore. I don't want to give up again.

So don't

-Butterfly. 

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