The Break Away Experience

 As I've stated before, I absolutely ADORE hearing from those of you Break Aways who are unlucky enough to land on my blog. Comments light my day! So tell ya ol pal Butterfly...  Where are you reading from? I really want this blog to be "active". I dont want this to just be about me. I'd love to hear from you guys! And if anyone ever wants to talk....  butterflymisita@gmail.com 

To survive I had to abandon everything in my life. I needed a complete restart cause there was nothing left behind me. So... I had to pursue my dream. Fuck it why not?  For me it had to be done in a way that was extreme enough to force respect for this process. And boy, it's been a bitch starting over. I can admit that, that it's been a bitch, but now that I'm independent and I'm working towards goals I can be proud of, I can see my life will "bear fruit". If I may be so bold to believe.  You see, in the past I was always doing things the easy way. I was choosing security over fulfillment, and due to this, I damn near drank myself to death. And in a way I had. By all accounts I was dead in many ways. Dead other than the lack of a heartbeat that is. Just a dead man walking. That was me. Is it still? I sure hope not. I liked the easy way. I liked it because well... it was easy. Simple right? Because I did not believe in myself I drank. And that was easy too. I b...

 I wish I could say otherwise, but I have a bad habit of viewing my life as a movie. I wouldn't call myself delusional, though boy, I'm only one step away. My friends call it being "delulu".  "Butterfly you so delulu".  Not quite.  I'll admit however that viewing my life as one big show is some sort of defense mechanism. And I'm not saying I'm working on changing this. I like it. It's fun. And ya know what? Fuck it. I've always believed that "it's worth it if the stories are any good".  However, I'm attempting to build a life on a foundation of truth. So yea... I take stories seriously and I seek out a life of adventure because I live when I'm a little on edge. Still though, I'll be a little real with myself.  Butterfly you're in the real world now dawg.  What's that? Who the fuck knows? But you're there. Always have been.  Temple was closed last Sunday, but it's poppin today.  I'll see you al...

Life... 5 weeks. 6 interviews. 1 offer rescinded. But it only takes 1 right? Today I was hired on the spot with a company I had previously applied to. This was a job I actually wanted before fully understanding how desperate my situation truly was. I burnt my boats after all.  Last month when I went in I was told that the position had just been filled.  Something you sick mother FUCKER!!! Though wait.... I happened to see the listing was posted again. So what do you have to lose when you have either lost everything or have thrown all that can be thrown.... far far away.  Rejection? I've already been rejected by the love of my life. What could be worse than that?  So I applied again. And while I was looking for an air pump so I could ride the 11 miles back home I received a call.  Yet another interview... Today marks the second successful completion of the three parts in phase one of The Break Away Experience 2.0.  The dream. I am officially an employed man....

Is there a point to this blog? I'd like to hear from you. And yes I mean you. Especially you... Is there a point to my words? You can always reach out if you'd like.  Is there a point in this expression? Or trying to explain? Come say hi. It'd be nice to hear from you.  Are you like me? Are you worried, hopeful, curious, ready? Where are you from? What's your vice? What makes you happy? Sad? Do you like movies? Art? TV dinners? Trampolines?  Do you think the weather is nicer when it gets hot or cold? Did you find me on Reddit? Do you have any questions about homelessness? Or the choices it takes to get there? Ever feel like Breaking Away?  Say hi. The Break Away Experience can't just be me... Or what's the point?  -Butterfly

 I found myself chasing a tweaker yesterday. Oh how this life feels so ridiculous to me. The man was chasing a child right through the park. "Run fat boy. Run!" He flipped me off. I flipped him the bird right back. Yea fuck you too buddy. He then tried to push a bicyclist off of his bike. I called the police. And I never found the child.  My friend was threatened by a tweaker yesterday. The guys pants were falling down and the man was challenging the room. More like the world really. He wanted a fight and he's lucky he didn't get one. My friend is a US Army vet. He's a chill person. Though I wouldn't like to see him snap. I woke up today. That is a good thing right? Sometimes I wonder. Though I was relieved the nightmare I had last night was only a dream, the yelling in the dorm reminded me that reality at times... Is a terrible thing.  Chaos. Dearest Chaos you are so familiar to me. I used to love you so much. You showed me that I am strong when I truly felt ...